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Early in 2019, Rhonda and I started to see ads pop up on Facebook for a trip to Rome with a Mediterranean cruise. Those that know us, know that we are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Our church builds Temples in all parts of the world. Temples are special buildings, different than the normal meeting houses we attend on a weekly basis. We typically plan our vacations so that we can visit a temple while we are gone. The church recently opened a temple in Rome. That’s a big deal considering how “Catholic” Rome is. The travel agency that put the trip together caters to members of our church and a highlight of this trip is a visit to the Rome Temple.

As we started to get serious about going, we thought it would be fun to invite another couple to join us. Joe and Amy Haggard have become good friends over the past few years and live in our ward (A ward is a congregation with a geographical boundary that members are a part of). As Amy and Joe got excited about going, we started to throw out names of other couples that would maybe like to join in. We decided to to go the first part of March, 2020. By the time the dust had cleared, we had 6 couples… Us, the Haggards, Brett & Julia Cotten, Clint & Melinda Mueller, Brent and Janet Larson, Brad & Sandra Nucci, Eunice Ensign and her sister in law, and then my sister RoAnn and my mother joined in a few months later.

When we chose the dates for the trip, we picked an itinerary that had a couple more days than other ones. Because we were going to be in Italy for 2 1/2 days before boarding the cruise ship, most of us decided that we wanted to see Venice, even if just for a day. We also decided to extend a day longer so that we could visit the temple outside of the tour group of 100 plus people. We let the tour company know of our plans, which completely overwhelmed them, and they proceeded to mess up everything they did from then on.. but that is a story for another time..

We made our payments, booked our flights, hotels and train tickets to Venice outside of the tour and let the anticipation keep us excited for this trip of a lifetime.

Covid-19… aka Coronavirus

In the weeks leading up to our departure, a new virus erupted in China and then quickly moved to Iran and Italy. Of all places… Italy. In the days before our departure, we were assured by the tour company that the trip was going on as scheduled. The outbreak in Italy was contained to a northern section of the country. Rome and our port cities had no cases. Venice was up in the air.. We were all going.

Sunday, March 1

Our international flight was from LAX, and all of us had different plans on how to get there. Brad is a frequent Delta flyer so he actually booked his own flight to and from Italy months earlier. The Haggards and us had booked a Southwest Airlines flight for that morning to LAX. At the same time as we were all making our way to LAX, we decided to cancel our Venice trip. The virus had expanded closer to Venice and we didn’t want to chance it. We would find something else to do in Rome for 2 days. We all finally met up at the gate in LAX for our 11 hour flight to Rome. 12 of us were on the same flight. One of the snafus of Cruisebuilders was that they never got Mom and RoAnn integrated into our group, so their flight was a few hours later, connecting through Zurich. Our trip was going through Paris.

The flight to Paris was full. One drawback of booking a trip through a tour group is that they buy the tickets in groups at cut rates. Good for them, but not good for us if we want to try to upgrade our seats. 8 of us.. Rask, Mueller, Cotten, Haggard were all on the same confirmation number. I had managed to get our seat assignments soon after receiving the flight plans, and I made sure that we were all grouped together as couples with aisle seats.

3:25pm was departure time. After an Air France safety demonstration, we were wheels up and on our way. A small meal and shot glass sized drink (Europeans don’t drink much water or soda with their meals), and we tried to settle in for as much rest as possible. Trying to do the math on departure city time, flight time and arrival city time is enough to make my brain hurt. I set my watch to Rome time (8 hours ahead) and hoped for the best.

Rhonda has trouble sleeping at home in her own bed, so she did everything she could think of to try to help with that on the plane. In the months leading up to the trip, she bought compression socks, eye covers, Melatonin, neck braces, blow up face pillows, Benedryl, slippers and even got a prescription of Xanax from her doctor. She looked like a walking CVS. After we landed in Paris, it was disclosed that she had taken a Melatonin and then a Xanax. Then another Xanax. Then another Xanax. And I wondered why she kept falling off her face pillow into my seat…

I watched a couple of movies, listened to music and tried to doze as much as possible. I got a couple hours of sleep. We finally landed at Charles de Gaulle airport at 11:15am on Monday, March 2.

We had to go through customs in Paris. Our passports were stamped and we made our way through the expansive airport to another terminal where our connecting flight to Rome would leave. When we entered the huge terminal, there was a piano in the middle of the oversized passageway. As we passed by, a man was sitting there haphazardly plucking out some kind of tune. I saw Joes eyes light up and I knew that he would be back over here at some point. Our layover was almost 3 hours so there was plenty of time.

Joe Haggard is a chiropractor by trade, in business with his father. He should be a concert pianist. He is one of the few people I have met in my life that can make a piano sing. He doesn’t just play it, he brings it to life. A small group of us walked back across the terminal to the white upright and Joe sat down. Interlacing and stretching his fingers, he smiled as he looked down at the keyboard. This is his element. As his fingertips touched the keys, the whole terminal was filled with beautiful music. Joe doesn’t play timidly. He plays with force, with passion and with the conviction of a master. He played a piece from Star Wars, Disney and a hymn from our church. People walking by would stop and smile. When he was finished, claps could be heard from across the terminal. It was a beautiful moment in the hussle of an international airport.

At 2:35pm our 2 hour flight to Rome took off. Upon landing at Rome and gathering our baggage, I was surprised that we didn’t have to go through customs again. I was actually looking forward to having my passport stamped by Italy. I didn’t realize that the European Union was just that. Come in through one country and pass easily between them. I should have known, based on the wad of €Euros in my pocket that would be valid in any country we were to visit. Guides from Cruisebuilders were in the terminal to take us to the hotel. The trip consisted of a 10 minute walk through covered passageways right to the Hilton Rome Airport. After checking in, we met in the restaurant to stuff our hungry bellies.

Because we had decided to cancel the Venice trip, we still had valid one way train tickets back to Rome for Wed. We learned that there was a train terminal adjacent to the airport, so the 4 guys headed over to inquire about a refund. As we entered the passageway, I saw the unmistakable silhouette of my mother walking towards us in a group of people. Their flight had landed around 7. We hugged.. the last time I had seen her was last June at her house in Utah. It was odd to travel halfway around the world to see her again. RoAnn was pushing/riding a scooter with her knee on it. Her car accident of 6 years ago manifests itself every day in her life. 45 minutes later we had filled out all the appropriate paperwork asking for a refund of our train tickets. We were told 4 weeks for a refund. We shall see…

…stay tuned for chapter 2…

I’m going in deep right out of the gate. I’ve had thoughts about doing this for some time now, and just never to took action to make it a reality. Today is the day.

I’m a 55 year old contractor/drummer/husband/father/grandfather. This past weekend I cried harder than I have for 14 years. That occasion was the death of my father in law. This time it was for a person that I had never personally met. How does that happen?

In the winter of 1980, I was a sophomore in high school in Covina, Ca. Charter Oak High School. I had played snare drum with the Marching Band in the fall and was now getting my first taste of playing in the Jazz Band. Drum set! My parents rented a 5 piece Royce kit for $25 a month so I could practice at home.

I don’t remember the exact moment it happened… Whether a friend played it for me or if I heard it on the radio, but the song blew me away. “Spirit of the Radio”by Rush. The drumming was frantic and over the top. I was immediately hooked. I bought the album (cassette) Permanent Waves and played it incessantly. Then I bought the previous albums and proceeded to wear them out.

My teen age and young adult years were spent listening to this band. I’m the oldest of 6 children and my siblings listened to Rush. My mother listened to Rush. My father… not so much. My drums were set up in my room and I would play for hours.. until dad got home. He would suffer through it for a short time, then bang on the door.. “Ok! That’s enough!” Mom was never that way. Honestly I don’t know how she did it. I guess that is one of the virtues of a mother. Patience.

As a teenager, when I listened to the songs, I focused on the drums, paying no real attention to the lyrics. At some point early on, I read in the liner notes that Neil Peart wrote the lyrics. At that point I actually thought he sang too! Back then we didn’t have the ability to push a couple of buttons on a hand held device and watch a video, so until I was corrected I figured him as the vocalist. It’s funny how a young mind, with no experience, works.

For the next 32 years, I purchased every Rush album as soon as it came out. I became intimately familiar with all of their music. As I matured, I started to really listen to the lyrics. My love for the band expanded as I realized that it wasn’t just Rock n Roll. There was something with substance in there. Philosophy, love, family, history, tragedy… all penned with precision by a drummer from Toronto. At a recent gig of mine, as we were tearing down our equipment, a DJ rolled his equipment in and immediately the bass thumping began. Almost every song had the same subject. Genitalia, sex acts and an incessant use of the N word. It is a shame that much of the youngest generation are so deprived…

My children grew up listening to Rush. I vividly remember my son, probably around 10 years old, singing to “Speed of Love”. That is what they heard if they were with dad. When my two daughters got married and we had our father/daughter dance, both of them arranged to have the DJ cut to a Rush song part way through.

Rush has been the soundtrack to my life for the past 40 years. I own 5 replica snare drums from the last 15 years of Neil’s career. Rush is a part of me.

Last Friday afternoon at 2:11, I was loading my drums up to go to a gig. My phone chirped with a message from a friend in Canada. “Dude” “What the F@#K?” I asked what was wrong. “Neil’s dead”. “No way” I typed. I hit the google search and found nothing. I ran into the house, sat down at the computer and tried again. There it was.. Articles were coming in from different sources. He had passed the previous Tues, Jan 7. He had been fighting brain cancer. I walked out to the living room, sat on the couch and just stared at the blank tv screen on the wall.

If it would have been a family member or dear friend, I don’t think it would have hit me any harder. The gig that night was difficult at times. I decided to play the one snare that I had never played. R40. The replica of the drum from the bands final tour.

It’s been a tough weekend. There were times when the reality hit me and I would lose control for a few moments. My Facebook feed is full of drumming friends, which turns into hundreds of posts about Neil. That has actually been very therapeutic. Reading others thoughts, that mimic mine is soothing. Bits of information are coming in from his small circle of friends. He was an intensely private man. He did not like the Limelight at all… He did not think of himself as anyone important. He was, indeed, important to hundreds of thousands of drummers and other musicians though.

I know that in the coming days more and more information will come out from those that were a close part of his life. One positive out of this tragedy, is that there is so much that he left for us to remember him by.

I am so grateful that as a 15 year old boy, I heard “Spirit of the Radio”. I am grateful to have had this mentor whom I never met be such a strong force in my life for 40 years.

A line from my favorite Rush song called “The Garden” Ironically it is the last song on the last album the band recorded. An absolute musical tour de force.

“The treasure of a life is a measure of love and respect.. the way you live, the gifts that you give… In the fullness of time.. it’s the only return that you expect. The future disappears into memory… With only a moment between… Forever dwells in that moment… Hope is what remains to be seen…”

Neil Peart… The way you lived your life has earned you enough love and respect for 100 life times.